Spiritual development is not linear happening.

Spiritual development is not linear happening.

It’s spiral. At any point, you can feel that you are back again at the start. In a way, you are, and you are not. One thing is for sure - the soft spots you thought were a long time ago solved and done will come and visit you once in a while. When they do, you often feel worse than before you started the journey. In those spots, self-compassion is needed. I believe that this is the most effective way to learn compassion - through radical forgiveness for my trespasses. It’s not easy. 

Radical self-forgiveness is how we can understand that difficult journey we are on.
Every soul journey is so individual that we can’t know where anyone of us truly is and what they should or shouldn't do. Good enough if we can find it out about ourselves. 

When you start your journey and get unforgettable experiences and results right from the beginning, it’s very typical; if you can, remember that you are not the chosen one who has to save the world. You have to protect yourself from yourself. For that, real superheroes are needed. While everyone else is looking for fault and someone to blame outside, superheroes stop spinning the world and dive in. 

Jewels hiding in your soul can be brought up one by one. You must dive a lot and rest between dives to digest the experience and integrate what You learned. I don't mean becoming a couch potato. I suggest taking time and space for yourself and doing what you love—moving in nature, being with yourself, and taking good care of the body and mind. 

Keep in mind - once You open that mystical box of self-discovery, there is no way back. It’s a spiral that, from outlook, takes you up to heaven, but over time you’ll experience that it takes you inwards, deep into your heart, passing through hells and heavens on either side, taking you to a sacred place where the source of life lives. You have to keep on walking the path. To make the path more smooth, become friends with fear and let it guide You deeper and deeper into your being. 

Writing this story reminded me of where I read about stages of spiritual development and their non-linearity of it. It’s from one of my favorite books - “ 40 rules of love” by Elif Shafak. Here are the seven stages of the Path to Truth every soul had to go through to attain Oneness. 

The first stage is the Depraved Nafs, the most primitive and common state of being when the soul is entrapped in worldly pursuits. Most humans are stuck there, struggling and suffering in the service of their ego but always holding others responsible for their continuing unhappiness. If and when a person becomes aware of the ego’s abased situation, by starting to work on himself, he can move to the next stage, which in a way is the opposite of the previous one. 

Instead of blaming others all the time, the person who has reached this stage blames himself, sometimes to the point of self-effacement. Herein the ego becomes the Accusing Nafs and thus starts the journey toward inner purification. 

In the third stage, the person is more mature, and the ego has evolved into the Inspired Nafs. Only at this level, and not anytime before, can one experience the true meaning of the word “surrender” and roam the Valley of Knowledge. Anyone who has made it this far will possess and display patience, perseverance, wisdom, and humility. The world will feel new and full of inspiration. 

Nevertheless, many people who reach the third level feel an urge to dwell here, losing the will or the courage to go further. That is why, as beautiful and blessed as it is, the third stage is a trap for the one who aims higher. 

Those who manage to go further reach the Valley of Wisdom and come to know the Serene Nafs. Here the ego is not what it used to be, having altered into a high level of consciousness. Generosity, gratitude, and an unwavering sense of contentment regardless of the hardships in life are the main characteristics accompanying anyone who has arrived here.

Beyond that lies the Valley of Unity. Those here will be pleased with whatever situation God places them in. Mundane matters make no difference, as they have achieved the Pleased Nafs. In the next stage, the Pleasing Nafs, one becomes a lantern to humanity, radiating energy to everyone who asks for it, teaching and illuminating like a true master. Sometimes such a person can also have healing powers. He will make a big difference in other people’s lives wherever he goes. In everything he does and aspires to do, his main goal is to serve God through serving others. 

Finally, in the seventh stage, one attains the Purified Nafs and becomes Insan-i Kâmil, a perfect human being. But nobody knows much about that state, and even if a few ever did, they wouldn’t speak of it. 

The stages along the path are easy to summarize and challenging to experience. Adding to the obstacles that appear along the way is the fact that there is no guarantee of continuous progress. The route from the first to the last stage is by no means linear. There is always the danger of tumbling back into earlier stages, sometimes even from a superior stage all the way down to the first one. 

Given the many traps along the way, it is no wonder that in every century, only a few people managed to reach the final stages. 

It is told that a personal experience is the only teacher to follow. Yet I have to admit that this requires genuine self-mastery to reach the point where your discernment evolves to the level of accuracy required for leaning only on your personal experience. 

That is why it is inevitable in earlier stages to follow the paths of Great Masters, who managed to reach the final stages on the Path of Truth. They have paved us with beautiful paths to discover and realign ourselves on our personal journeys. We can stand on their shoulders. 

Only when we are truly ready to take a leap, let go and fall into our manifestation of highest Grace. 

Luckily we are living in a moment that many prophecies consider as a time of many awakened ones. This door has never been more widely open than now. Yet, simultaneously, it requires total concentration and trust from us to keep walking on the spiral pathway.